Maintaining a healthy relationship with your ex can be a challenge for anybody. Adding a child to the relationship as a third party can make that task all the more challenging, but all the more necessary at the same time. Getting a divorce does not mean that your child has to grow up feeling as though he or she comes from a broken home, feeling a significant imbalance in the level of involvement of one parent in their life versus the other. Learning how to co-parent successfully is key to your child feeling a sense of security in his or her life. The two most important rules of successful co-parenting with your ex are: understanding that your child always comes first, and being civil towards each other.
The first rule of successful co-parenting is for you and your ex to come to the mutual understanding that your child always comes first. Following the split from your ex, your life will change significantly as the two of you start to move in your own directions towards whatever it may be that makes you happy. This is natural, but it is important to remember that successful co-parenting is designed to make your child feel as though as little has changed in his or her life as possible. As you and your ex “move on” by relocating or bringing new partners into your lives, be sure to remain disciplined in openly communicating with your co-parent about all issues concerning your child, such as their schooling, their medical needs, and the creation of a flexible visitation schedule for them.
The second most important rule of successful co-parenting is to always be respectful towards your co-parent. In addition to open communication, successful co-parenting is reliant upon mutual respect between exs. This rule can be especially difficult to follow if the initial break-up occurred as a result of feeling a lot of tension in the relationship. However, if you and your ex can show your child that the two of you are able to be civil towards each other, he or she will feel all the more secure in their day-to-day life. Keep the following rules of thumb in mind when trying to be respectful towards your co-parent: speak highly of each other to your child when the other is not around, do not try to control how your co-parent cares for your child when you are not around, be respectful of any new relationships that your co-parent nay have in their life, do not use your child as a weapon in resolving conflict between you and your co-parent, and do not get hung up on insignificant issues between you and your co-parent,
At Simonetti & Associates, we have more than twenty-nine years of legal experience to put to work for you in reaching a child custody agreement that would best allow you and your ex to co-parent successfully. Visit us for your free consultation today!